fitness competition Archives • GloBelle Affairs

November 12, 2013

All You See Is Pictures

While I was still reeling from “My Ultimate Journey” high, I couldn’t overlook some of the less than supportive comments left on my social media pictures. I know my friends were just trying to be supportive of me, but they did it at the cost of other athletes and it doesn’t have to be that way. While I appreciate the recognition of my own hard work, it”s also important to realize the hard work others put in.

First, these are my teammates. I depended heavily on them for support when I was ready to give it all up. They were my accountability partners when it came to staying true to my diet, guidance on better recipes and workouts, and even spotting me while I pushed myself to my limits. I couldn’t have been successful without them. A win for me, is also a win for them.

Second, you just never know where others started from or how much one had to overcome to get to where they are. One teammate is 45-years-old. After taking shrapnel while deployed in a combat zone, she medically retired from the Army. It took extensive physical therapy and medical care to get her walking back to normal again. You know, after being an active, senior enlisted leader then transitioning to being physically incapable to do simple tasks really takes a toll on a person mentally. Just her being able to work out again was a success. She pulled herself out of depression and put in work. She turned the entry points of all her shrapnel into lady bug tattoos all over her body. To those who didn’t know her before, she may look bigger than most contestants. However, she dropped so much of the weight she gained while immobile. Putting on a tiny bikini and clear stilettos and walking confidently on stage was a turning point for her confidence and she didn’t deserve to have all her hard work deflated by insensitive comments.

It’s like getting honors at graduation and being all pumped up full of accomplishment and someone flippantly saying the criteria for the honors was too low or undeserved. It just takes the wind out of your sails.

Everyone deserves to feel as amazing and powerful as I felt that day! You can say, “You look great” without saying, “You look way better than those other girls” because those other girls worked just as hard and are equally as beautiful. You can say that you would have judged me to be the first place winner rather than saying the first place winner didn’t deserve her title or saying the judges were clueless. You can compliment without comparison.

Pictures don’t tell you that a competitor was fighting cancer while training. They don’t tell you that a competitor overcame diabetes just by training. Pictures don’t tell you that a competitor started from being paralyzed from a bad car accident fought her way through recovery. They don’t tell you that a woman just had a baby 7 months ago. They don’t show you a competitor went from not being able to do a single push up to being able to knockout 10 pull ups. They don’t tell about the mom who couldn’t keep up with her kids, but now can interact with them while they actively play. Pictures don’t tell you about the athlete who overcame anorexia and adapted a healthier lifestyle. But those are the stories behind the pictures of the bodies that shared the stage with me.

I appreciate the love, but love is best when it’s shared. I think we can all work on being a little more mindful of having stronger compliments. Strong compliments are the ones that stand on their own, not the ones that are only valuable in comparison to another.

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