So this guy is just a google.de image of a German man (come on guys, I can’t really just go around snapping photos of the beautiful strangers I run across on a daily bases). He is just an example of the serious cuteness that wanders the streets of Germany.

Okay, let’s talk about guys. That’s what people really want to hear when talking about Europe…guys.  Do you know, when I told everyone back home about me moving to Germany, they all said something tantamount to, “Prince Charming is over there waiting for you.”

No one ever said there was a Prince Charming waiting for me in China (which with high ratio of men to women, would probably be more likely but that’s a whole other story to discuss at another time).

Here’s my take, thus far, on European (and more specifically German) men.

The German Men

How cute is this Deutsche Olympian?

 “Why on Earth don’t they like me,” I asked the small heard of German-speakers at an international cocktail party on the beach in Montenegro.  When in an international setting, I now tend to settle amongst the Germans. I am a Stuttgart girl. Germany is home. My question was the response to an Austrian telling me that, in order to learn German, I needed to do one of two things:

1. Get drunk, and then talk to everyone

2. Get a German (speaking) boyfriend.

Getting drunk is about as easy as downing one German-sized hefeweizen.  Scoring a German-speaking sweetheart, well, that’s horse of another color.

The beautiful sunny view from the terrace of the hotel where we worked. Germany was gloomy and about 50 degrees Fahrenheit when we left. Montenegro was amazing!

One, I already have a French-speaking American beau that I’m not interested in trading in at the moment. And yes, dating him has improved my French.

Two, while I will say I do have a hint of modesty, I’m well-aware that I possess many features often attributed as standard, conventional beauty.  I’m in shape and, like all southern belles are raised to do, I put effort into my appearance.
I understand I may not be attractive to everyone. But after a year or two in Germany, no German has even tried to approach.  I explained that and my new friends acted shocked that I don’t attract the German men!  Ever so often a group of folks from all over Germany working in our IT company travel from time to time to Eastern Europe. This was our second time traveling together somewhere. The first time, they taught me some German and inspired me to continue learning in a classroom. Now, I was ready to practice on the out on the town.  Most of the men were named Michael. There was one Klaus.

Me with the German-speaking Michaels (Austrians included!)

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One guy friend said, “No! You know you’re beautiful. Attractive.  If you don’t think so you are crazy!” Michael # 3 made a point to make sure I knew and understood my appearance met approval.

“They don’t know how to take you,” Michael #1 explained.

I explained how I asked a cute neighbor, Sebastian, to dinner once and never heard back from him. They asked how long I knew him. I said less than one hour. And they explained that was the problem. Germans get to know people first. One of the Michaels said, “If you asked me to dinner, I would think you were joking to make fun of me,” stating that I was much too beautiful to be interested in him. He said Germans are shy.  They all assured that German men are not
blind and really are attracted to me… except maybe the “schwul” ones.  “Everyone in Germany understands ‘schwule,’ even the non-German speaking American girl.  And yet, they don’t hit on me. I even initiate convo in their language. They pay no mind. Hmm…I think, maybe it’s because I’m an outsider. Maybe they don’t date sub-six foot women.  The Germans and Austrians I conversed with suggested the key to getting in good with German men is to establish a German female
friend base. It is true; the folks I hang out with the most are other Americans or at least other Expats.  So, I think I’ll work on it a bit more in a new direction knowing that I am the one who has to show interest and make the first move.

Generally speaking, I’m against objectifying all people. But just for this one instance, I’m taking a moment for revenge on all women who have ever been objectified by objectifying men back.  This German guy, is a swoon-worthy object of lust! He’s Badden-Wurttemberg boy, Michael Fassbender who played in Inglorious Bastards and 300!

I see beautiful German men all the time on the train. They are a phenomenal specimen of men. These men are the skyscrapers of men. They can work a business suite like no other. The whole darn country is active and sporty and it shows
amazingly well. They have these mysterious blue eyes under dark hair or sometimes blond hair. Germans have very captivating, science & logical minds.  And in this group of men, they are a ton of fun and loads of laughs. I think it’s a true indicator of your grasp of a language when you can tell jokes that translate well, and these guys were like a joke factory.  After our discussion I decided to research “The German Man” and came across this article.  In order to effectively communicate, I must know my audience.

This fella is just one of many gorgeous soccer (ah-hem, football) players in Germany: Bayer Leverkusen.		Why is he so cute?

Anyway, I think as a whole in general, German men follow the values of the old south. Men take the responsibility of being a leader and provider of the home seriously meaning they will work to provide for their family. They are also taught to be polite and not hoot and holler at women as American women (and French ones and Italians) are accustomed. Maybe German women have trained them well enough that men who take the more caveman approach are not successful. Although I don’t think American men who catcall are rewarded by their behavior and yet it seems to happen anyway.   Apparently, a German guy could be very interested but never let on in the conventional U.S. fashion that he’s into you. Now, I see German couples all the time with German babies so someone is being successful in getting German men to make a move.  The approach to capturing the heart and attention of these men are quite different than what we’re
socialized in American, France and English dating culture. Thus, German men are the most difficult group of guys I’ve come across in breaking into the dating scene. But like with all things, if it was easy, it would lose its value. I’ll keep you posted on how my research goes.  Now, back to my more professional self.