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January 24, 2017

Black History Month Reading List for Young Readers

A tri-image. The First a bright, modern wall-to-wall book case. The second shows a Black father reading with his son on a sofa. The last photo is a close up of a book stack.

If were to list all the things my mom (an English teacher) did right, filling my childhood bookshelves with exciting, memorable stories would be tops. It wasn’t until my friends started having children that I realized we didn’t grow up reading the same books. Oh, the books we read at school were the same, but I was nurtured in a different wealth of literary magic at home. That’s what inspired this Black History Month Reading List for Young Readers — to have suggestions at the ready when asked. If you were hoping for a similar  Reading List for Adults, don’t worry; I have you covered.  

 Compiling this multicultural book list just in time for Black History Month was a fun, nostalgic walk down memory lane. Most of the stories on this list were on my childhood bookshelf. Others have been written since my childhood. Some depict historical realities, while others showcase the richness of the African Diaspora. Parents can use this list to encourage a positive self-identity, strengthen empathy, and as a way to bond with their little learners. For teachers, this Black History Month Reading List for Young Readers can serve as a learning aid. Even if the stories are not read right away, simply having access to the books is fortunate.

 

Representation and Inclusion

Less than 3% of children’s books published in 2015 featured black characters. The statistical correlation between young black boys’ disinterest in reading and the lack of stories that feature them is little of wonder. Books transmit values. They explore our shared humanity. What message is sent to all children when some children are not represented in books?

 When books (movies and toys, for that matter) reflect the truly diverse world we live in, children can better speak to more experiences and show our differences and commonalities in a positive light. The six books in this section of the Black History Month Reading List for Young Readers aim to celebrate and include.  Minimal emphasis isplaced on race. 

Childrens Black History Month Reading List/ 28 children's books for Black History month
Several of these titles won’t be found on my list. This picture is just my way of slipping more books on this short 28-book list.
  1. Corduroy by Don Freeman – A cute little story about a cute little bear who is loved by a cute little girl named Lisa.  Perfect for younger children with no emphasis on race but simply a representation (and humanization) of black characters. This classic has been enjoyed for over 50 years! It can be found on YouTube.
  2. A Pocket for Corduroy by Don Freeman– The equally charming sequel to Corduroy.
  3. Cherries and Cherry Pits by Vera B Williams – My kindergarten librarian read this to our class.  I remember the beautiful colors more than the plot. It’s easy for little ones to identify with the main character who is a very creative artist. Plus, she wears her hair in ball-balls just like I did.  The pictures steal the show in this book and encourage imagination.
  4. Amazing Grace by Mary Hoffman. — I adore this story about a little girl who adores stories!  This is an encouraging account of a little girl with a big imagination and a talent for acting.  It’s a reminder not to listen to the critics, and you can do anything you put your mind to. Besides, this book makes references to other well-known stories, some of which are found in this reading
    list (hint: Anansi the Spider). Although not cultural, the book Chrysanthemum, written and illustrated by Kevin Henkes, also pairs well with the theme of Amazing Grace.
  5. John Henry by Julius Lester – This Caldecott Medal Winner encapsulates several John Henry tall tales in one.  Conclude reading this story with the Ballad of John Henry (you can find the song on YouTube). Make it an American Tall Tale theme by including the adventures of Pecos Bill, Paul Bunyan and Babe the Big Blue Ox, Johnny Appleseed, and Thunder Rose.
  6. You Can Do It by Tony Dungy. – This New York Times Best Seller encourages little ones to press through challenges and recognize their own special gifts. It’s also a great read to remind parents to take advantage of opportunities to encourage their children.  The story makes strong religious references and is read aloud on YouTube.

Black History Month Reading List for Young Readers

The next 12 stories in this reading list provide a historical narrative into the wide range of challenges and triumphs of Americans.

  1. Pink and Say by Patricia Polacco — My mom read this to me and cried. Then my fifth-grade teacher read it to our class, and she cried.  I recently watched it read aloud on YouTube, and everyone was commenting that they were crying.  I’m crying writing about it. You’ll probably cry too.  You must read it! It’s based a true story that discusses the unlikely friendship forged during the Civil War.
  2. Henry’s Freedom Box by Ellen Levine — The true account of a young American man’s daring and creative escape to freedom.
  3. The Story of Ruby Bridges by Robert Coles. — NoThis is the true story of the little kindergarten girl’s quest to go to school. Ruby now lives in the Biloxi Area.
  4. White Socks Only by Evelyn Coleman and Tyrone Geter uses
    African American Vernacular English (AAVE) to capture a time in our nation’s history. This might be a good time to discuss AAVE as one of the many forms of English spoken in America. All countries have their own vernacular and dialect of the primary language. It’s a pattern of speaking and based on oral tradition and some people switch back and forth from Standard American English and AAVE. The story is about a Mississippi girl who thinks “Whites Only” means white socks only.  Although this book wasn’t published until after my childhood, it reminds me of a story that one of my elementary school teachers told our class. She remembered seeing the signs and always thought the “colored” signs meant colored water. She was disappointed when she wasn’t allowed to use the colored fountain to see the colorful water come out. It’s read aloud on YouTube.
  5. Black History Month Reading List for kids includes the story of Fannie Lou Hamer, the voice of freedomVoice of Freedom: Fannie Lou Hamer, Spirit of the Civil Rights by Carole Boston Weatherford. The Author is a Boston native who provides an autobiography of
    a soulful singer and activist during civil rights.  It has received Caldecott Honor, NAACP, Robert F. Sibert, John Steptoe, and Coretta Scott King Award recipient. It’s steeped in poems and colorful illustrations celebrating the life of this powerful-voiced voting rights champion. Be sure to listen to music by Fannie Lou Hamer as well as supplement the book with references from YouTube, movies, or biographies for more historical context.
  6. Malcolm Little: The Boy Who Grew up to Become Malcolm X by Ilyasah Shabazz. — This picture book written by his daughter focuses on Malcolm’s childhood.  This story ends triumphantly in the seventh grade when he, the only African American at school, is elected class president.  At 48 pages, this is for older readers or will take multiple reading sessions.
  7. Dear Benjamin Banneker by Andrea Davis Pinkney and Brian Pinkney.—This is a look at the life and times of the 18th-century scientist.  It focuses on his correspondence with Thomas Jefferson and the dichotomy between his Declaration of Independence and his enslavement of people (including his own children).  On display at the National Museum of African American History and Culture is one of Thomas Jefferson’s drafts of The Declaration, which included a paragraph on slavery.  Rather than drawing attention to the obvious misalignment, both northern and southern slaveholding delegates objected to its inclusion when the document was presented to the Continental Congress on July 1, 1776.
  8. I, too, am America by Langston Hughes — This Coretta Scott King Illustrator Award book introduces children to the 1925 classic poem of Harlem’s Poet Lauriat. You can see the poem recited by Denzel Washington on the Great Debaters with additional historical context and reference to other poetry of the time. This picture book could be used for memorization and recitation.
  9. Ruth and the Green Book by Calvin Alexander Ramsey and Gwen
    Strauss—    This is a reminder that cross-country road trips (including military members PCSing) were certainly a bit more treacherous for African Americans in 1950.  Told from the perspective of a little girl who leaves Chicago to visit her grandma in Alabama, this is book is a good gateway to introduce “Sundown Towns” and concerns black Americans still may have to consider when traveling. Ruth’s story is fiction, but The Green Book and its role in helping a generation of
    African-American travelers avoid some of the indignities and safety risks of America, a historical fact.
  10. Freedom Summer by Deborah Wiles and Jerome Lagarrigue — Two best friends are just alike in all ways, except in the way they look. They learn that in the South in 1964, it takes more than a new law to change hearts.
  11. The Other Side by Jacqueline Woodson— Clover’s mom says it isn’t safe to cross the fence that segregates their African-American side of town from the white side where Anna lives. But the two girls strike up
    a friendship, and get around the grown-ups’ rules by sitting on top of the fence together.
  12. Bill Pickett: The Rodeo-Ridin’ Cowboy by Andrea Davis Pinkney and Brian Pinkney— The biographical, sweat-and-dirt tale of the feisty cowboy-child who became one of the most famous rodeo performers who ever lived. Today, there’s even a rodeo invitational named after him. It will make you want to saddle up. Includes a note about the history of the black West and a bibliography.
 

Black History Month reading list for Kids includes Bill Pickett, Malcolm Little, I roo am America, Pink and Say, Ruby Bridges, Ruth and th eGreen Book, and White Sock only.



Classic Tales of the African Diaspora

Lastly, on our Black History Month Reading List for Young Readers, we have ten stories that focus on celebrating the diverse and vibrant cultures of the African Diaspora. Some tales, like Uncle Remus, are unique to America. Others, like Anansi, are classic to a particular tribe in Ghana and shared all over.
Why do chameleons change color? Why is the ocean blue? Children are naturally curious about the wonders of nature, and sometimes, parents don’t always have the answer.  Pourquoi tales [por-kwa] (means “why” in French) are a theme of stories around the diaspora. They attempt to answer the inquiries while inspiring imagination and feeding little one’s interest in the natural world. All cultures have their own version of pourquoi tales, and they provide insight into cultural cues.
  1. Why Mosquitos Buzz in People’s Ears by Verna Aardema – This is the quintessential Pourquoi tale depicting a West African Jungle disaster with vibrant Caldecott Medal Winning Illustrations. There are many other similar stories but knowing this story is an absolute must.
  2. Anansi the Spider by Gerald McDermott– This Caldecott Medal-winning Pourquoi tale explains how the moon came to be.  This is just one of the many stories and adventures of Anansi, a well-known character from Ashanti folklore that spread throughout the diaspora. This particular tale reminds readers that everyone has their own special gifts for the greater good.  You can watch animations of the spider on YouTube.
  3. Mufaro’s Beautiful Daughters by John Steptoe – This is my favorite princess story! It’s a classic tale that serves as a constant reminder that a queen is, as a queen does. This book has also been adopted into Spanish and can be found read aloud on Reading Rainbow and YouTube.
  4. Tales of Uncle Remus: The Adventures of Brer Rabbit by Julius Lester                                          Uncle Remus is the Aesop of America. The Uncle Remus tales are an oral tradition, originally written down by Joel Chandler Harris, were first published over a hundred years ago, and serve as
    the largest collection of American folklore.  The way you tell the stories are almost more important than the stories themselves. If you are going to tell the tales, you got to tell it right. If your southern mama didn’t introduce you to the stories herself, be sure you practice and watch movies or YouTube to get the voices right.  Disney even has a ride based on the Tar Baby, and once you know the stories, you appreciate the ride even more.
  5. A Pride of African Tales by Donna L. Washington— This book reintroduces Anansi from Ghana and offers new stories from The Congo, Nigeria, Cameroon, and the Democratic Republic of the Congo (don’t miss the opportunity to explain the difference between the Congo). Each story teaches a valuable life lesson in character development.
  6. The People Could Fly: American Black Folktales by Virginia Hamilton. This book houses a cannon of African American folklore with gorgeous illustrations. The well-known author retells 24 American folk tales in sure storytelling voice. They include animal tales, supernatural tales, fanciful and cautionary tales, and slave tales of freedom. All are beautifully readable. With the added attraction of 40 stunning paintings by the Dillons, this collection is calling to be part of your library. I was mesmerized by the images long before I read a page.
  7. Bruh Rabbit and the Tar Baby Girl by Virginia Hamilton — Make sure your little one knows the story of the Tar Baby first. This tale is retold in Gullah, not Southern AAVE.
  8. Big Mama’sby Donald Crews— Auto-biographic, depiction of family nostalgia.  In addition to sharing the love and warmth of family, it also provides cultural insight. I once brought a friend to my southern gospel-style church.  While I readily recognize “Mee-ma, and “Mammaw” as terms for grandmother, it never occurred to me that my friend would need to ask, “Who is Big Mama?” This book serves to bridge cultural understanding.
  9. The Hundred Penny Box by Sharon Bell Mathis–                                                                          Winner of a Newbery Honor, this beautiful story is infused with family warmth.  As a child, I liked the story, but it wasn’t until I was an adult and experiencing the challenges of my late age grandparents
    did I spontaneously recalled this story and thought, “This is just like the Hundred Penny Box.” I suddenly identified with it even more.
  10. Jambo Means Hello: A Swahili Alphabet Book by Muriel Feelings                                                Africa is the second-largest continent in the world with 53 nations with a combined total population twice the size of the United States. It is a vast and diverse land of waterfalls, mountains, deserts, rainforests, and grasslands. The languages of Africa are also diverse, with 800-1,000 different languages spoken among the people.  One of the most common languages spoken is Swahili (or Kiswahili, which is the proper way to identify the language.) Kiswahili is an Arabic word meaning “of the coast” or people of the coast. It is one of 80 Bantulanguages, and is the national language of Tanzania, Kenya, Uganda, and is spoken in Burundi, Rwanda and Zaire, and other parts of central and eastern Africa. This book introduces a word for each of the 24- letters in the Swahili alphabet (No Q or X) with a brief explanation of each word introduces an East African custom.
Unfortunately, my local Barnes and Noble doesn’t have half of these classics. So, to get them in time for February, you may need to order online or check them out from your local library. Remember, this Black History Month Reading List for Young Readers isn’t just for February — it can and should be read year-round. 
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December 26, 2012

2013 Projections: Eliminate

 

Holidays are seasoned with tradition. Although most traditions are steeped around Thanksgiving and Christmas, New Years also has its traditions in my family. Before every year my mom makes her signature dish, hoppin’ John, on New Years. And every year, even though my mom’s dish was delish,  my sister and I would go out with friends or eat something else. Which lead to my mama, bless her heart, fussing about all her effort and  food that got wasted.

As an adult, I’ve started my own traditions.  I’ve welcomed the New Year by fasting and praying and getting into my Bible for some direction. The quiet days away from class and work are the perfect time for reflection on the past year and planning for the next.  Since college graduation I’ve spent my New Year’s in some pretty exciting towns: Nashville, Orlando, Atlanta, and last year in Paris.  This year I’ll be spending “Sylvester” as the German’s call it, with a dear cousin, at the biggest party spot in Europe, Berlin!

In 2012 I vowed to do more and I have to say in comparison to 2011, I succeeded. I wanted to:

1.  Run More – I ran a 10K dressed like super hero, Storm.
2. Be more health conscious – I competed in a team obstacle course, started training for a fitness competition which requires weight lifting and a clean diet.
3. Write more –  I’ve published 50 blog posts this year.
4. Travel more – I traveled to 15 different countries and spent 67 days traveling and exploring Europe.
5. Be more proactive in learning a language – When it came to learning a language, I took 12 hours of German language lessons, 12 hours of Spanish language classes, and 72 hours of French language lessons.  I can get directions and order food in four languages.
6. Complete more of my Master’s program – I have one class left before I can call myself An International Affairs Master.
7. Patron the arts more – I started the year by watching a ballet in Vienna. I’ve been to Monet’s home, visited the Louvre three times, and been to enough art museums across Europe to establish the standard that if a museum costs more than the Louvre, it’s not worth seeing (take that Switzerland!)
8.  And paint more.  I have completed one ceramic and one canvas all year.

Now it’s time for me to start honing in on the goals I want to accomplish for myself for 2013.  I need to go for quality, not quantity. Pick one language and really master it. Take longer, more relaxing trips instead of trying to cover too much ground in a short time.  This year will be the year to eliminate. Eliminate distractions, clutter, commitments. Then I won’t be stretched out too thinly and I can produce better projects and better results. And after being completely finished with my degree, I just want to relax as much as I can and enjoy being young and in Europe.

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December 4, 2012

Southern Belle’s Take On New Holiday Traditions

Photo from O.com
In the South, like most places around world, the dinner table takes center stage during the holidays. Thanksgiving with my oversized southern family is incredible.  First of all, you must understand that my Alabama Grandma, Lula Mae, has seven children, 23 grandchildren, and something around 20 great grand-children. Such a troop only begs me to wonder what Abraham’s holidays must have looked like. My dad and his brothers try to outdo one another with their cooking skills. My dad will herb roast a turkey according to some recipe he saw on Emeril and Uncle #2 will deep fry a Turkey while Uncle #1 and Uncle #3 will came up with pulled pork or some sort of sugary, sweet ham. Even when we set a menu we still end up with dinner yeast rolls, corn bread, buttermilk biscuits, banana nut bread, and muffins. We always seem to have food for days… duplicates of everything…a whole pie, cake, cobbler, or other sweet concoction for every family to take home after the first helpings are demolished. There’s always an assortment of new twists on traditional holiday favorites. My cousin Karla, bless her heart, just couldn’t seem to perfect homemade mac & cheese two years in a row and did not escape the light-hearted teasing.  She didn’t even attempt it the third year although we were eagerly waiting to see if she nailed the recipe. Now, I am not so proud to admit it, but I also flubbed the homemade mashed potato recipe two years in a row. Let me tell you, if you burn the bottom the pot, that nasty burnt taste will permeate through the entire batch.  But these are memories that make up the holidays. Although we stress about prep and it takes a week to sort out the mess after wards, we are so fortunate to have such a storehouse of food and those to share it with.
Me on Thanksgiving.
This year I spent all Thanksgiving week in a bikini in the Canary Islands. It was beautiful, sunny, and warm! But back home in Kentucky, Uncle #2 pulled out all the stops for the family Day of Thanks. A long table trimmed in red stretched from the living room, through the dining room, and into the kitchen. There was the now-annual family flag football game while the final preparations were made in the kitchen. My dad’s birthday, which is usually an afterthought to all the holiday festivities, was celebrated with a bakery designed cake. The fests continued into the next morning with a breakfast buffet and Black Friday shopping. It just looked like a grandest of times in pictures.  My little cousins came home from their first and second years in college; some with sweethearts. My two newlywed cousins came with their husbands. The military service members in the family were able to attend. Everyone was there except me.
My Aunt & Uncle’s home
When I moved to Germany I made it my stand that I would not return to The States for two years. That way I’d save money on plane fare and embrace the European culture as long as I could. However, the pictures of my family shared this past Thanksgiving did make me long for home just a tad.  As I’ve gotten older I find myself longing for yesteryear when we use to go to the movies (and watch Home Alone) after dinner or when my cousins and I tried acting out the Nativity Story using my only younger male cousin at the time as the baby Jesus (he was not having it!). Over the past few years family members have gone to be with the Lord, join their new spouses’ family for the holidays, or experience heath problems; family leadership has shifted and traditions seemed to die out. I just wasn’t feeling the holiday spirit anymore.  We just kept trying to do the same things we did when Granny/Aunt Ollie/Grandma were around and they just turn out to be poor substitutes for the original.

 

It’s taken being over here and peering in on my family from the outside for me to notice that, just as my family experienced  new births and growth, the traditions were not dying out — they were transforming and being born.  Even thought my family experienced deaths, we are no where close to dieing out. Families evolve like the culture around us.  It’s silly for me to wish that we stays the same.  I mean, I know it sounds so trite & cliche —“Embrace new tradition while honoring the past,” but this is the first time that I’ve actually seen those ideas in action. Each year we seem to welcome new members to our family. Each year we indoctrinate the little ones who were born into the family on the pieces of us that make us unique.   Those who unite with us from other families incorporate fresh ideas and introduce new family recipes to our ever evolving traditions. The bulk of my family members are Generation Y-ers.  We’ve all grown up and are accomplishing goal after goal and realizing new dreams.  Instead of there being two separate dinner conversation being split between the adults and children we can all participate and have meaningful discussions about our amazing experiences, and stories, and opinions. And what a wonderful new tradition we’ve started of actually being active and playing football instead of watching it on TV!  It’s bonding, team-building, and making memories wrapped in a cleverly disguised package.  Of course we couldn’t have had a good game when we were a bunch of 7-year-old girls, but now, let the trash talkin’ begin!
My favorite photo of me & most of my Belle cousins a few years back.
When I return to the holiday dinner table next year, I’ll return with new Schwäbisch dishes to enhance the menu. I’ll get to see which one of my cousins becomes the mac and cheese queen (or king). I’ll have stories of my adventures abroad to tell and new traditions of my own. I’ll have the opportunity to get to know my sister and cousins as the adults they’ve grown to be and not only remember them as the children they once were and speak to my aunts and uncles as an adult.  And lastly I’ll come home with a greater appreciation of my family and, as wild and loud as we may be when we all get together, I’ll enjoy the time I have with them and the the way we are right now.
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September 29, 2012

It’s Official: I Have Travel Burn-Out

Guten Tag Ya’ll!
It’s been a while since I’ve written. I just got home from an exciting work venture that required long days and exciting nights with international cohorts.This year, in order to accomplish my main goal of doing more, I pressed through demanding graduate-level courses and traveled all around Europe this summer. My original goal was to visit a new country per month. In essence, that should be 12 countries per year. But I exceeded that. It’s not even October and I’ve visited 13 different countries this year and duplicated a few.  I have traveled somewhere just about every weekend of this year. Now, the idea of traveling somewhere this weekend makes me want to groan. It’s official. I am experiencing the symptoms of travel burn-out. I never anticipated reaching this point.

I AM BURNT OUT!

I am coming down off my high from weekend, after weekend of travel, constantly being around people 24-7 for either work, school, or sleeping in open rows of bunk beds.  Finally, I am in my own bed, in my own flat, with my own schedule. And really, I’m not sure what to do with myself. But it feels outstanding!

Now that the influx of summer tourists has departed the continent, it’s prime time for residents to hit the French Riviera. Except, I don’t want to.  I mean I’d love to see San Tropez and Ibiza. But I just don’t have the will to pack and go.

It’s the start of early Fall in Germany! A gorgeous time of year full of cow fests, pumpkin fests, corn mazes, and of course Volksfest and Okoberfest. But jumping in the car or hopping on a plane to go isn’t moving me out of this bed.

Next week is my Columbus Day weekend. Last year, I visited Columbus’ debated home of Mallorca. This year, Oktoberfest is on the menu. But what shall I do with the rest of the four-day weekend?  My energy is strained. This weekend my preferred weekend-get-away location is my bed.

There’s so much to do and see and I just cannot make myself go out and touch it all. I suppose I have a little bit of guilt for not being motivated to take advantage of my location and limited time in Europe.  I suppose I never believed this could happen to be. I believe I have to take a rest on the short weekend trips all over creation and give myself some longer stays. I need to go back to my original plan of one country a month and maybe instead, just enjoy beautiful Germany in the fall.

Read more about travel-free/travel burn-out weekends here:

Travel-Free Weekend • GloBelle Affairs

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August 7, 2012

Be A Good House Guest

Back in the old south, hosting long-term guest was an art form.  Travel was more challenging back then so when people did make long journeys via riverboat, train, or horse carriage, their stay was also much longer.  As I learned from visiting the Houmas Plantation just outside New Orleans, visitors were welcomed with a pineapple placed at their bedside.  When they received their second pineapple, it was the host’s polite way of saying that guest’s welcome had expired and it was time to start making travel arrangements back home.
 

After talking to some co-workers, I’ve noticed Americans living in Germany all have similar experiences when it comes to hosting guests. Folks from back home will say they want to come over and never do. Or they do come over for an extended stay that sucks the soul out of those who of us who live here.  Having guests should not cause the host to be stressed the entire visit or alter the host’s lifestyle too tragically. Your primary goal of a guest is to not impede or interrupt the lifestyle of your hosts.  So here are a few ways you can be a pleasant house guest.
 

On Arrival
Tell your host when you’re coming and going early.  That includes dates and times. People pick up and go to all sorts of far off destinations.  Last thing your host needs is to rearrange her schedule or travel plans to pick you up at the airport because you give her three days or less notice on when you’re coming.  Every day in Europe is an adventure.
 

Pack light.
Do not bring your entire wardrobe! You can always point out the American at the airport…the one that needs the cargo carrier to cart their luggage. No matter how long you’re staying, you only need one suitcase. Europe has washing machines.  It also has little cars. Do not bank on your host having an American sized car than can carry everyone in your parties three pieces of luggage. Don’t bank on being picked up by car, you may be sent a taxi or be riding the train! Remember, you always return with more stuff so save room! 

Bring a gift to say “thank you” when you arrive. A host gift displays your graciousness to your host’s generosity and hospitality. Consider bringing something from home that they cannot get easily in Europe.
 

Your Stay

Noise control: if your host lives alone, she is probably accustomed to peace and tranquility.  Give her some time to have that. Limit times when the TV is going, people are shouting conversations above the t.v. and YouTube and the iPod going all at once. Chances are if you’re in Europe you live in a flat with neighbors all around. You don’t want to leave your host in bad graces with her neighbors.
 

Be independent as quickly as possible. Even though they have graciously invited you into their home, they have already rearranged their normal routines on your behalf. Their hospitality also requires their investment of time, energy, and money for extra food and drink, utilities, and other costs.  Be mindful of that and do not depend on your host to research activities for you, chauffeur you from place to place. Learn things on your own quickly. Learn www.vvs.de and German road signs quickly so you can rent a car.
 

Get out of the house. As Ben Franklin once said, “Fish and visitors stink after three days.” If you are staying for a longer period, find way to leave and stay elsewhere (i.e. a trip to Austria) for a few days to give your hosts some private time.  Everyone needs a little alone time for peace, quiet, and recharging. Your host is accustomed to you not being there. So strike out on your own once in a while so your host can have that alone time.  Just be sure to communicate this with your host so she isn’t expecting you for have dinner or other activities she may have planned.
 

Let your host sleep: Let your host get to bed for a decent night’s rest. Your hosts may not be on vacation as you are (most have to work while you play).  While you may be jet lagged and awake at all hours, your host needs to work. Make an attempt tohurry and get on your new time zone’s schedule. You can bring your own earphones for listening to music or for watching TV. That way you will not keep your host awake all night or feeling restless because of the activity, noise, and lights.
 

Clean up after yourself. Do NOT leave your dirty dishes in the sink. This is just rude, even if your host does. You should leave the kitchen cleaner than you found it, but hopefully it goes without saying that you clean your dishes as soon as you’re done with them.
 

Keep your guest area neat. This is not your home. Make your presence as unobtrusive as possible. Keep your belongings out of the way. You’re on vacation, not in a rush to get to work or school…you have time to make your bed in the mornings. Put dirty laundry in a laundry bag or plastic bag. Just shutting the door to a messy room is NOT an option. If you are a smoker, do not have your host sweeping up your ashes.
 

Use the guest bathroom. Don’t disrupt my host’s morning by having to sort through you’re toiletries to find her own, or have to wait for you to get out of the shower, or deal with your messes.
 

Always offer to help at mealtimes. Your host is not a servant. There is nothing more debilitating than having guests who sit around waiting expectantly for all meals. Offer to cook, help cook and clean afterwards. Hosts often say there is nothing for you to help with, however, you can find something, whether it is consolidating trash, washing dishes, slicing veggies, etc. If you cook for yourself, cook enough for your host… especially if you are using your hosts’ kitchen staples and supplies.
 

Be flexible and adaptive. You adapt to the hosts preferences. They do not cater to you. This is not a hotel.
 

Learn about the electricity! Last thing your host needs is a huge electric bill because you, acting like a typical American, left the transformer plugged all week. Or, you blow your hosts flat screen because you don’t know the difference between a transformer and an adapter. Ask questions. You have google at your finger tips…use it!
 

 Make contributions. Go grocery shopping, foot the bill at a restaurant, do home repairs, clean up, take out the trash.
 

Do your own laundry. Your host works while you’re home all day. Do not quadruple her work load by adding your laundry and your children’s to hers when she gets home. This way, you are solely responsible for your own lost or damaged clothing as well.
 

Entertain yourself. This goes back to the “become independent as quickly as possible” tip.  Your host has probably already spent time mapping out plenty of things for you to see and do. Do these activities during the day while your host is away. Your host has probably already visited the sights many times before. Let your hosts make it clear whether or not they have the time to take you to places, or to spend entire evenings with you. Don’t assume that you can rely on their generosity to drive you to places or to show you around.
 

Communicate. If you’ll be out in the evening or if you’re bringing food home it would be nice to let your host know that you don’t need her to cook for you ahead of time.  Let her know if you’ll be out all night. Make sure your lines don’t cross. Let your host know your plans.
 

Be appreciative. Show appreciation for the local food, sightseeing, and other attractions. Show appreciation for the host opening her home to you. Do not criticize. If things are so much better at home, you could have stayed there.
 

Be considerate with phone usage. Don’t rack up crazy fees. Ask before you call back home to the states or make international phone calls all over Europe or even within the same town. German phone calls are priced differently than in the states.  Even landlines calls across town can have pay by the minute plans.
 

Do not invite other people to the residence without first clearing it with your hosts. This is just common courtesy and respect, as you are a guest, not an equal member in their home. It’s also a security risk. Now this person knows where your host lives long after you’ve returned home.
 

Parting is Such Bitter Sweet Sorrow
Leave a thank-you gift on your departure. Send a thank you card after you arrive home.
Don’t leave work for your host. You are not staying in a hotel.  Your host will have to tidy up after you leave. Make sure you return your accommodations in the manner as you received it so your hosts don’t need to spend time re-organizing after you leave.  If you shop to the point that you can’t fit everything in your suitcase, pack your own boxes to ship things home, DO NOT just leave a mess of items for your host to pack and ship later.  You host may be hosting other guests soon after you leave so help her out.
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In Local Guides, Take Notes on
August 4, 2012

A Southern Girl’s Guide to Hitchhikers

10 Things I Remember About My Aunt Ollie

1. My Great Aunt Ollie was a phenomenal woman.

 

2. She was known for her big heart that had a soft spot for nurturing children. When a child was in need, her heart and home was always open.

 

3. She displayed her big heart by unofficially, on two occasions adopted two boys whose parents just decided to abandon their parental duties. She raised these boys and made them part of the family.

 

4. My great-aunt Olive was a leader. She dedicated her life to being part of the solution to make our small town a better place. As a city council member, she envisioned the town she grew up in as a place that the youth would want to return home to after college.  Not only did she dedicate her life to public service but she lead our family. Even as a member by marriage, she led as a matriarch.

 

5. My Aunt Ollie was the fastest girl in the state of Kentucky, winning a state title in the girl’s 400 meter dash.  Her running discipline as a teen was evident with beautiful, shapely legs as an adult.

 

6. She could throw a party at a moment’s notice. Her pantry was always stocked with delicious goodies. Her fun, social personality could make the simplest gathering around her kitchen entertaining.

 

7. Ollie could transform her house into a wonderland at Christmas time.  Every year, late into the night on Christmas Eve you’d find her entertaining while whipping up magic concoctions that released hypnotizing scents into the air, making even the devil believe he was in heaven. Her living room would be filled to the ceiling with mountains of gifts for her grandchildren and loved ones. A slice of her velvet cake would make you believe.

 

8. When the angels carried her on to Heaven, mourners filled the church paying their respects. The mayor choked-up delivering his eulogy. Traffic was stopped on the busiest street with the longest procession that town has seen. “Will be missing you” played on the radio during her procession. When she died, all our family traditions died along with her traditions died right along with her. We were left trying to figure out, what will we do at holidays without her?

 

9. She was my uncle’s Sarah (without the whole infertility ordeal).  A mother to more than just her two biological children. A princess. Someone to emulate, respect, and honor.

 

10. I was loved by her. This world lost her a few days after my high school graduation. She left my uncle a honey-do list which included getting me a luggage set as my graduation gift. When I consider it now, here she is, fighting cancer, being calling home and she’s still thinking about taking care of me. There’s no doubt that I was loved by her. Back then I only had the perspective of a child on the verge of becoming an adult. I wonder the conversations we’d have if she were still around. I wonder what she’d tell me about leadership. It’s amazing how much you learn about a person after they pass.

A Southern Girl’s Guide to Hitch Hikers

On my way home from class from Heidelberg to Stuttgart I was running low on gas and needed an emergency pit stop. While pumping some diesel into my little golf, a young man came up to me with a map asking if I could get him and a friend closer to München (not sure why English speakers call this town Munich).  “So, you speak English well, how did you learn,” one asked. I explained I was American which is when they revealed they were Dutch. He and his bud were on a race to Sziget Fest in Budapest and had traveled all the way from Rotterdam, Netherlands to nearly Stuttgart all by the transportation of wonderful strangers.  The loser had to buy the winning team “Ali Baba pants.” The other team was way behind them in Cologne, Germany.  I was going to just drop them off on the side of the road as they requested when they let on that they were planning on pitching a tent in the woods somewhere.
Well how could I allow that to happen knowing I had two extra beds? I brought them back to my place.  Which, as one of my friend’s pointed out, sounds like a classic plot to a certain type of movie, if you know what I mean?
These guys made it from Rotterdam to Stuttgart
 I got them set up with internet so they could tell their friends and family that they were alive and well. They started mapping out their plan for the next day. I offered to make pasta (via popping open a pre-made easy bag).  All they wanted was bread. Well, I also had ham and sliced sandwich cheese.  They raised an eyebrow at my miracle whip. “Sounds interesting” they said.  They didn’t use it.  I served them on paper plates since my cabinet crushed my real dishes. We had a laugh about Ikea kitchens. Apparently everyone knows someone who’s wall mounted cabinets have fallen before. I pulled out some mandarin oranges, stuffed peppers, granola, different antipasti type foods AND cheese from their homeland that I served on Delft blue cheese board. They were tickled. “Some people think this is all there is to the Netherlands” He said in references to the girl in wooden shoes in front of a windmill painted on my traditional blue pottery. “Windmills and marijuana” he said somewhat disappointed.
I wound up going to bed. They stayed up on the computer before cuddling up in my pink & chocolate brown clad guest bedroom (It makes me smile seeing a guy curled up in my pink blankets). They had planned to leave at dawn but must have needed the sleep. In the morning, the two showered up — it’s refreshing to get a shower in their mode of traveling and they were very grateful.  I was grateful that they were very tidy, picking up after their mini meal, making the beds, and cleaning their bathroom mess. I caught them before they slipped out around 0900. They were in the process of leaving me a bottle of wine, which I traded with them so they could give to someone else who helped them. They said they tried to give it to a trucker who helped them most but all the trucker wanted as an energy drink. They left the kindest note which concluded, “American hospitality is the best.”  

It was that note that made me feel like I represented my country and the south well. More than that, I was reminded my favorite scripture Hebrews 13:2 “Do not neglect to show hospitality to strangers, for thereby some have entertained angels unawares.” In considering this scripture, I also thought of my late aunt. Maybe this was a verse that she lived by.  The gratitude shown by these teenagers because I offered them my surplus of empty beds, leftovers, and a place to wash up humbled me.  It’s been almost a decade since that June day we put Ollie in the grave but I know, that if everyone she touched is being hospitable towad strangers, that she still lives through them.  What a wonderful inheritance she left the world in her 54 years.  She is one of my real life examples of a true representation of a Southern Belle.

And they’re on their way! Good Luck guys!

We waved good bye, and I wish them luck on their way. I’ll say a special prayer for them tonight that the good Lord keeps them safe and they continue to come across amazing strangers and learn that this world is a wonderful place.  I understand the dangers of opening my home to strangers.  My mom made sure I understood and praise God I’m still alive to speak of this adventure.  People tell me all the time that I’m too kind and people will take advantage of my hospitality. And at times it has been true.  But people do not get attacked because they are kind; they get attacked because someone with a sick, wicked mind intentionally set out to hurt them. We can’t afford to live our lives with so much fear in our hearts that we cannot be a saving grace to our fellow humans.

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In Local Guides, Take Notes on
July 28, 2012

Travel-Free Weekend

 

This weekend is the first weekend since March that I have absolutely nothing planned.  Initially I had planned to visit the castles in Cesky Krumlov, but due to a lack of interest, that trip got cancelled!  Although I feel somewhat guilty that I’m not on the go, I really think it was God’s message telling me that I need to chill.  Bruno Mars’ “Lazy Song” is my theme for the weekend. I am worn out! Recouping will be my most productive weekend since my intensive travel began.

 

Keeping with my “Travel More” inspiration for the year, this is what I’ve done:

 

January

Paris
Munich

February

Vienna, Salzburg, Budapest

March

Albania

April

Paris
Disney Paris
Amsterdam & other Holland cities during tulip season
Polish Pottery girl’s weekend

May
  Me @ Keukenhof. with over 7K tulips

Bolzano, Italy
Ljubljana, Slovenia
Normandy, France

June (My family is here!)

Paris
Montenegro
Neuschwanstein
Ulm
Munich

July (My Family is STILL here)

Belgium
Zurich, Switzerland
Poland
Czech Republic
Triberg in The Black Forest
Garmisch, Germany

ME & BABY BELLE IN THE BLACK FOREST

What I still want to do (in no particular order of priority):

Oslo (I have not visited my friend there yet).
Scandinavia Tour
Med Cruise  to Santorini, Croatia, Turkey
Revisit Prague and visit to Cesky Krumlov
Revisit Switzerland (I wasn’t impressed the first time)
Beach: Ibiza, Monte Carlo, French Riviera somewhere
Scotland
Russia
Poland: Krakow maybe Warsaw
Portugal
Italy: Roma, Venice, Pisa, Florance, Milan, Vatican

Spain: Barcelona, Madrid, Seville, Valencia, Malaga, Ibiza, Granada, Cordva, Gibraltar (it’s really GB I know), Canary Islands, Having A Coke With You tour (Check out Frank O’Hara’s poem)
Germany:  Oktoberfest!, Romantik Road, Koln, Berlin, Dresden
Africa: Ferry from Gibraltar into Africa, Seychelles (Even though It’s not Europe, I’m thinking it must be cheaper
from Europe than the U.S. and I’ve never been south of the Equator)
France: Versailles, Paris Catacombs, Moulin Rouge, French cooking school, Nancy, Lyon, Nice, Marseille, Seine River boat Ride, Jim Morrison’s grave site, Saint Tropez, Marseilles

Then of course there are the activities like skiing, white water rafting, marathons, concerts, girls get-a-ways, and romantic retreats that I also want to experience. Then I can say I came, I saw, I conquered all in Europe.  Still very ambitious. When I graduate in May, I’ll return to The States.  I can’t help but to feel my time for touring, exploring, and pilgrimage-ing is running out.  Even Stuttgart is a holiday. I am still wandering into new neighborhoods and discoveries with every new turn in this fabulous hometown.  There is still much in Germany that I have yet to see and explore.

All those trips will have to wait. This weekend, I’ll just enjoy summertime in Stuttgart.  I’ll be finding my balance, getting my life back in order, and recharging from a whirlwind of a year thus far. Besides…I have books to read and papers to write…coming upon my final semester as a grad student! Although it’s bitter sweet, I can see the light at the end of the graduation tunnel!

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